I've been into a lot of frustrations and disappointments this past few days. Not on the things God have blessed me but on what I was to Him. Naging pasaway ako na anak. I acted strange. I don't know why, but I believe God has seen me.

I didn't have my devotionals at the right time. Napabayaan ko ang iilan sa mga disciples ko. Lagi akong late sa bible studies. Nawawalan ako ng gana mag-update ng blog ko. Ni hindi na ako nag-checheck ng account ko sa The Rebelution. But hey, in front of a lot of people, I'm a servant of Christ, though inside me, I felt like I'm a traitor. These happened within 2 weeks I guess, all because of one thing - CELLPHONE. Bumalik yung pagka-addict ko.

There were times that I felt guilt inside. Despite all these things I'd done, God still continues to be faithful. He answers my prayers when I call to Him. He shows me His revelations when I need them. And He continues to embrace me at times when I forget my commitment to Him.

Last friday, January 11, 2008 everything came back. We had this spiritual encounter with God for those teens who were not yet able to accept Christ. As I was watching them, I could see myself. I could feel the strange emotion I felt the time when I finally accepted Jesus in my life. Then I saw the smiles beaming on their faces.

The music was playing . . .


I broke down and cried.

"Oh Lord Jesus, forgive me. Forgive me for all I've done. I've been into a lot of temptations yet You continued to be close to me. Now I could feel how You want me the most. I'm so sorry Lord for I failed to be what You wanted me to be. I wasn't able to meet all my promises to You. I couldn't do it Lord. Please help me. I am so ashamed of myself. Help me to surrender the very worldly things I could hardly surrender. Teach me to move on ways according to Your will. Show me how should I act for Your glory."

I knelt down. I almost kissed the cold floor. Tears were trickling on my cheeks. I wanted to stop crying but I couldn't.


From that moment I could feel God's embrace and the heat of Him wanting me back. I just didn't understand but I made a decision that I know it's for Him and for Him alone - I surrendered that very thing, my cellphone. I could live without it for living means having God in Your life even not having all the things in this world.

I was refreshed and I couldn't promise to God again. But I would try my best to do what I've told Him since the very day I accepted Jesus - I wanted to be pleasing in His eyes.

Now I'm updating my blog again. Not because of I just felt like posting nonsense but because God called me to do this for Him. This blog is dedicated for him. And I should work all my best for this blog. This is not just a blog but a living testimony of a teenage girl who cries for the name Jesus Christ in her life and the lives of others.

I won't let any thing hinder me on serving Him. I wanted to be in His mansion and to be powerful in the name of Jesus Christ before my 18th birthday.

I want to thank all my brothers and sister in Christ for showing me how great is our God. To our pastor who have told us that life with Jesus is full of hard things, but that's what really life is and a life that is worth living for you will gain an eternal prize.

To my discipler Chloe, who had shown us a heart that is burning for Jesus, that being a child of God you will do everything like simply telling them "Jesus loves you" even though people would stone you to death.

And to all of you guys who always check my blog and read my post. My blog won't have any worth if it didn't have any reader.

Help me spread the Good News, the message of the cross, and the Love of God for all His people!

Soli Deo Gloria!