My Papa has another woman. Period.

The news turned my world into the broken pieces it used to be. I heard it from the very lips of my mom, while she was sobbing to death. I could feel the pain and anger excruciating her. And me, I found myself staring blankly on my computer screen.

My papa has a woman.

Yes, it pains so much. I couldn't believe it. I had never imagined it ever in my life. My Papa is the best dad ever in the world. Even though we didn't have much time with each other cause he's always abroad, I could feel how much he loves us, he loves me.

There were times back then that I felt sick with his reprimands, and mother's too. I would want to run away from home, hide in a place where there's only me and my shadow. But I was too young to better understand the love they have for me.

My dad always believed in me. My mom told me that. He believed in all my abilities. And he always wanted to give me all I "want" to have. He loves me. He loves us.

I could still remember when I was still 9 years old, I was criticized by my mom 'cause I wasn't able to meet her expectation on a said inter-school competition and it made me cry a lot. My dad went in my room, embraced me in his warm arms and said, "Tara! Gusto mo ice cream?" I nodded. We walked together and instead of thinking about what my mom did to me, my attention focused on the ice cream, really. And the happiness I felt when I was having a walk with Papa.

I thought everything was OK, until the day came when my mom said my Papa has another woman. My mom discovered that, and my dad honestly admitted it. I could never believe it. He would never do it, I said to myself.

Days after that very second my mom disclosed the news, I could hardly sleep. I always found myself talking on the walls, asking them why did this happen to me, to my family. I cried.. and cried.. and cried.

And I could never accept it. Never! Mom and Dad are always having fights about the matter now. Instead of taking strengths from each other, they keep pushing themselves down. The thought of it makes me want to give up.

I opened up the matter to my discipler and to our church pastor. I cried to them and they sympathized. But instead of worrying, they told me that this time I must take my strength from my Heavenly Dad and lift this situation to Him.

I went home, I prayed, cried, prayed, worshiped,

"Lord, I know this is not part of Your will. Help me overcome this. My Dad was just tempted. He never intended it. Help me God. I don't want my family to be broken. We've always been a good happy family. Save us God! Save my family. And save my Dad. Comfort my Mom and help her forgive my Papa. I already had forgiven him. I know he never intended it. He was just tempted. Lord, I want my papa to be happy, with us his family. Help him realize that we need him, and he needs us too! Please Lord. And I'm praying for that woman too. Help her realize that what she's doing and she's feeling towards Papa is not right. Send a man for her God, the man You made for her. And save my family. Please Lord. To You I trust these everything. I have no power over this.

I love my Papa. I don't want to lose him. And I don't want my parents get separated. Please God. Your my family's only hope. My brothers didn't know about this yet, but God, give me strength on that right time when I'm going to tell them about Papa. Please God. Please....(T_T)"


I don't know why I've opened this up. I maybe am just too bold to share this very private matter. But I want you guys know that I'm under a very difficult situation now. I'm under confusion, that's why I didn't blog that much anymore (and not even updating about the Team Blog Proposal I passed to some). But I never lose hope. I could still smile. I've got faith, and my top priority now is to PRAY and PRAY! My comfort is God, and He's our hope.

To those who belong in broken families, I know exactly how you feel. I don't know if mine is worse. But believe that God's up there, He's in control of everything, and He will never give up on us. And He's mighty to save our families! Let's pray for our parents, and constantly express our love for them. Our love is their comfort and their strength!

"I love you Papa. Even if you're not really reading my blog, I want these readers know how much I love you! How much I need you! And how I'm praying for you and Mama. Pa, we'll never give up on you. We'll always be here no matter what. I know you're confused right now, but Pa, trust God! He's GOD! And He Loves us!"


ILOVEYOU PAPA KRYDH!

your daughter,
Jazzy